It is the little things that sometimes really are the big things in life – kindness matters

Well it was a late night for us. Last night, due to our own incompetence, we missed the start of the #PlatinumJubileeConcert so had to watch it on catch up TV. It was, however, simply brilliant. Whoever thought about inviting Paddington Bear to be part of the concert was inspired. However, stepping back from the weekends celebrations for a moment, last Tuesday was World No Smoking Day. As regular readers of this blog will know, I have long campaigned for the eradication of cigarette smoking. It was going to be the focus for this week’s blog. But events have overtaken me and it’s the kindness of others last week that I want to write about first – if there is room in this blog, I will come back to the stop smoking issue later.

The first random act of kindness was on last Thursday. J and I had gone to what is called the Comedy Carpet here in Blackpool. It’s just under the famous Blackpool Tower. We, like many thousands of others, were there to see our heritage trams. We often see them on their own trundling along the prom, but this was a rather special Jubilee celebration bringing them all together at the same time. I don’t think the organisers had reckoned on so many people attending. There was much jostling and pushing to get the best view. It was chaos, the officials struggling to keep folk off the tram tracks.

As we stood and waited a young man arrived with a big video camera, professional tripod and equipment. He and his companion struggled to find a clear view of the track, and began to lose their patience with those around them. Into this chaos another man arrives. His face is familiar. I turn to J and say, ‘I think that’s Roger Johnson from the BBC North West Tonight programme’. He hears me, looks up and smiles. After assessing his cameraman’s situation Roger decides to move to somewhere a little more prominent. He helps collect the equipment and as he passes us, he pauses, says hello and asks if we are okay and enjoying the afternoon. It felt like a genuine and warm moment. He didn’t need to stop at all. The pause was a little thing, but it is the little acts of kindness that make the big difference. We didn’t see him again until later that evening as he broadcast his show live from The Comedy Carpet.

The second act of kindness was the following day. We had a walk planned. To get to the walk route, we needed to take a tram and then a ferry to get from Fleetwood to Knott End across the Wyre estuary. As we are on an economy drive J had purchased a day ticket the day before and we were mindful that we needed to catch the return tram before the ticket ran out. We got on the tram with 5 minutes to spare on the ticket. However, the tram wasn’t scheduled to leave for another 6 minutes. Some slight anxiety as the deadline loomed. The conductor came to the rescue and accepted the ticket with just seconds left on the timing – apparently it was J’s smile that clinched it. It was another little act of kindness. He had no need to do what he did.    

The last act of kindness followed a very sad event. Last Wednesday, one of our Ragdoll cats went missing. She’s called Delilah, (seen here to the left of the picture) and was my favourite of the four cats we share our home with. She was a happy afterthought, when we went to buy her sister, Willow, I decided we couldn’t leave Delilah behind, so purchased her too. They have both given us much pleasure and as far as cats can, they provided unconditional love and regard. Delilah has sat beside me all through the pandemic Teams and Zoom meetings. She’s rarely missed one.

By Friday, when we still hadn’t seen any sign of Delilah, J mounted a social media campaign asking for any sightings, neighbours to check their sheds and so on. Sadly, Delilah had been knocked down by a car but had managed to get herself on to a neighbour’s drive before she passed away. Our neighbours didn’t know who the cat belonged to and as she wasn’t chipped (another story) they couldn’t find out. The family called the Council who came and took Delilah away. They then posted a message on social media asking if anyone was missing a cat, describing Delilah to an absolute T. When J contacted them, the family were in London celebrating the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee, but still took time out to tell us what had happened and what they had done in caring for Delilah even when she had died. Their kindness made our loss slightly easier to bear. It was a little thing, but it made a big difference to us.

On a weekend that up that point had been so full of joy and happiness Delilah’s untimely death filled us with sadness*. Writing this on Day 102 of the war in Ukraine, made me realise what so many folk caught up in the war must be feeling. Delilah was a cat who was much loved, but she was a cat. Many Ukrainians will have lost so much more during the conflict. They remain in my thoughts and prayers.

I also gave some thought last week, to others whom I’m sorry to say previously, I had not given a great deal of thought to at all. It was to the people who live in the 59 countries that make up Africa. The continent was in the news last week as Africa has become the new marketplace for tobacco. Globally, smoking has been in decline, but mainly in those countries worldwide that raised taxes on cigarettes, limited cigarette marketing, banned smoking in public places, and instigated hard hitting anti-smoking health campaigns. In such countries there has been an unequivocal reduction in the percentage of the population who continue to smoke or start smoking. In many of the countries in Africa, the reverse is true.

What was once played out in the US and Europe by multinational tobacco companies, is now being seen in Africa. They are selling cigarettes cheaply, and to young people too and using the power of marketing to make smoking glamorous and cool. I don’t know what the answer is, but we need to find a way to help African countries tackle this problem. If we don’t, the hard won health gains across Africa are likely to literally go up in smoke. We should remember that their problems are our problems too. I’m sure we can all do something, and enough little things can bring about big changes.

 

* Billy our parrot, who mimics everything we say, and all the noises we make (pouring wine, answering the phone and so on) has, ever since we had the cats, called out Delilah, Willow, Clemmie whenever we open the patio doors to call them in for their food – he hasn’t yet realised Delilah has gone and at present he is still calling them all in.