That Was The Year That Was

It was the social theorist, Pierre Bourdieu who coined the term ‘conjunctures’ to describe the social contexts within which social change can occur. It's a way of thinking that explores possible relationships between time, demography, race, economic status, education, family cohesiveness and so on. However, social life is not always conveniently organised in this way. Arguably any possible association between conjunctures, personal and societal characteristics and a particular outcome, is at best, likely to be indirect.   

But that doesn’t stop many of us travelling through life comfortable with having a sense of a possible future and a feeling of trajectory. Thus we attend school and university to learn, to gain qualifications, which, in time, might support a career choice. We work and save our money to buy a house and/or perhaps start a family and so on. We reassure ourselves that we ‘know where we are going’ and what our future will be like. Can I suggest, that for many of us, this sense of purpose and control is completely illusory. We tend to ignore the fact that many of our life experiences are riven with uncertainty. And I think most of us prefer to be able to live our daily lives with at least the illusion of certainty and predictability. 

I was reflecting on these thoughts as my clock hands turned through midnight, and the last day of 2017 started. In another few hours a new year will begin and with it will come new opportunities and challenges. It will be my 63rd year, something I was also thinking about. Some of those years have passed by in a blur, others stick in my memory for both good and bad reasons. Getting married; buying a small-holding in Wales; the birth of my children and becoming a father; qualifying as a nurse; and being appointed a professor for example. These were all positive events that were, in the main planned and expected. Other years have given rise to less positive memories. I remember the Aberfan disaster; the horror of 9/11; the Lockerbie bombing; and the Manchester arena attack. These dreadful events remind me of the sometimes uncertain and unpredictable world we live in.

My 2017 year was full of planned and unplanned experiences. Grandchild number 10, Carys, arrived as expected, David, my brother-in-law died, unexpectedly. I sold my Jaguar and bought a hybrid Toyota. I was interviewed by the NMC, BBC, CQC and was told I owed no money this year to HMRC. My personal life and my relationships with others proved to be very turbulent – mainly due, as Leonard Cohen once said, ‘to those promises I made and could not keep’. The impact of these relationship choices on the lives of others was profound, and not for sharing here. I entered my second year as an Associate Pro Vice Chancellor and finally got the Industry Collaboration Zone programme up and running. And chose to retire 1 year earlier than I had always planned to.

Some of these events and experiences I hadn’t predicted or planned for. Equally what I wasn't expecting to happen was to develop an all consuming depression. It very stealthily crept up on me and when I finally realised what was happening and sought help I was at a very low point. I am not sure whether there was a cause and effect relationship between some of things that happened during the year, and my depression. Thankfully I have been, and continue to receive great care from my GP. He has been a constant point of support the last 6 months. I am not sure where he gained his experience of helping those with a mental health problem, but I have definitely benefited from his wisdom and knowledge. I don’t feel ‘cured’ but I do feel better in myself.

It has been a strange year and one that at times I have struggled with. Fortunately I have also been blessed with some very good friends, and family, who have also unconditionally been there for me. I have a long retirement to look forward to, and so far, 2 months in, I absolutely wonder how on earth I ever had time to work! Among my Christmas gifts were cookery books. Reading these has rejuvenated my love of creative cookery, something I have not always had time to do when working.

I was also given the ‘No such thing as a Fish’ Book of the Year. A brilliant read, jammed pack full of facts and information on the weirder side of 2017. When I opened it to have a quick look, the page fell open on the story of Rabbit Hash Town, Kentucky The good people there elected a Pitbull called Brynneth Pawltro as the town’s Mayor. It is the 4th year in a row they have elected a dog as Mayor. This year, however, the dog faced stiff completion from a donkey, cat and a chicken. Having helped a Parliamentary candidate fight the UK 2017 General Election, an experience that had me vowing to steer clear of politics for the rest of my life, the American system sounds so much more fun. 

As I have traveled through my year of sometimes challenging ‘conjunctures’ there has also been much advice and information to be heeded along the way. For example, we should all buy the smart toothbrush that warns of impending heart problems; and there has been a renaissance in the thinking that sees LSD as a brain booster (takes me back 40 years); and that the average number of lies (false and misleading claims) made by Trump each day currently stands at 5.5 (according to the Washington Post); and finally, where the most Googled question in 2017 was ‘what is cancer?’

Against this backdrop of rather weird bits of information I just wanted to say one thing, but say it very clearly. Dear reader, many, many thanks for your support during 2017. I hope your 2018 brings you what you want, or at the very least, what you need. Enjoy the next 12 months, but today, I think its enough just to simply keep warm and stay safe.